There are several advantages to the All-Female mosque visit. For a start, the mosque arranges for a woman to conduct the tour. It is not dominated by a self-conscious male imam. In my experience, women very quickly getting to chat very easily about all sorts of things when it is an all-woman environment. The first one I organised was led by two women in full hijab both aged about 30. After the tour of the mosque, one of the first questions was about arranged marriage. The two spoke freely and surprised the visitors because one was single with no imminent plans to marry.
One participant who took part in a different visit commented:
Visiting the mosque as a small group of women and being shown around by other women was a real privilege. I think we were shown areas that the men don't normally see - like the kitchen (a chance to chat about our favourite foods to share) and the room where bodies are prepared for Islamic burial. We talked about how professionals tend to care for our deceased family members now, but how British women would also have been the ones preparing loved ones for burial in generations past. It was quite a tender moment of reflecting on this last service that we can perform for someone.
I appreciated being able to ask the ladies questions as we moved around the building and observed classes for children and preparations for a celebration later in the week. It was quite natural to ask about whether the person I was speaking with had always been religiously observant or had come to have stronger sense of faith later. My guide shared quite honestly about her more recent deepening commitment and plans to visit holy sites in Iraq.
I asked lots of open questions as we went around the mosque because I wanted her to know that I was really interested in finding out about her beliefs and customs. I think it's important to go with curiosity - I wasn't really looking for opportunities to share what I believe but to build a relationship and leave her feeling that meeting with Christians doesn't have to be confrontational.
We were invited to come back for the celebration, which I couldn't do, but I did keep in touch with my guide for a while (we live a long way apart!).
How can such a thing be organised?
Some kind of personal connection is essential. In my case, I (a man) was friends with the imam. I asked him if he could arrange such a tour for us. He put me in touch with one of the young women who I think worked as a teacher and it developed from there.
If you have a Muslim friend, ask her for her advice. Explain that you want to observe to better understand. Even if she is not regular at the mosque she may be able to put you in touch with someone. She might of course invite you to something less formal. There are lots of devotional and teaching activities outside of the mosque.
Which mosques?
A large number of mosques in the UK do not have space for women. Those that do are often bigger and frankly more interesting. Although mosques are in theory all independent of each other and run by local people, there are associations. The Minhaj ul Quran network mosques ALWAYs have a women’s department run by a women’s committee. That is part of their distinctive model.
The main thing is to start with a personal connection. You tap into the guest-host dynamic. If you do not have such a connection yourself, ask around in your area who does have connections with the mosque.
These days there is quite a push to get Muslims more involved in running and representing the mosques in their community. Baroness Warsi is involved in one programme.[1] The Muslim Council of Britain is also taking steps.[2] Now might be a good time.
[1] https://religionmediacentre.org.uk/news/campaign-launched-to-open-british-mosques-to-women/
[2] https://mcb.org.uk/initiatives/women-in-mosques-development-programme/
